I received a phone call the other day from a nurse with our insurance company. She is my "case manager" which I never knew I had until that call came! After introducing herself, she went on to say that the reason she called was because she had never seen a person my age have a hysterectomy. . . Why would someone SO young have to have one. . . and on and on. After a what seemed like an eternity of listening to her, I began to cry, rather sob. At this point she knew that she had crossed the line and had really hit a nerve. She backed off of her pedastool and began to ask me why this had to happen and what all I have done in order to prevent this. At the end of our 20 minute conversation, she apologized for upsetting me and we hung up the phone.
She is not the first to make comments or assumptions. That is what I am facing regularly. If I were 38 or 48, instead of 28, I am sure that I would not get questioned to the extent I do. It is amazing what just a few years will do. . . So, if you want to know, just ask and don't assume!
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Oh, this makes me so sad. I really do feel your pain. And the age does not matter as much as one would think. I wish I had a dime for every person who has assumed I do not want children. After all, I am 36. Why not end my pain and just have a hysterectomy? I literally sat in a restroom at the hair salon 2 weeks ago sobbing because of comments like this. Do they think I would not be a good mother? If so, why? My insurance company has accused me of trying to get them to cover surgery because they think it is elective, as if I want to rip out my ovaries. Sure, jerks, I want to never be blessed with children. I can only imagine how you feel. But in this case it makes me mad b/c that witch hurt someone I adore, you.
ReplyDeleteGod has a plan for me. I do not know what it is. She needs to read #3. This is from one of my favorite books, "The 4 Agreements". #4 makes me think of you.
The Four Agreements are:
1. Be Impeccable with your Word: Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the Word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your Word in the direction of truth and love.
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
3. Don’t Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
4. Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.