Wednesday, September 14

A Weighty Issue

I have eluded to it before, but now it is real and ridiculous. I have reached an unpregnant high for me. . . I am not going to give numbers as that is just too much for me to deal with, let just say, I weigh as much now as I did when I delivered Wesley. Granted, I only gained 12 pounds, but still, it is hard to swallow. Nobody else is worried or concerned, but I am horrified. I am freaking out. I am embarrassed beyond words. . .

Those that know me well, know that the scale and I do NOT get a long AT all! In fact, we are enemies. One time, I was so frustrated with the number it said, that I threw my $50 scale away! We absolutely, positively do not get along. . .

Now I know that it is normal to gain weight after a hysterectomy. That is par for the course. I hope that I would be immune from that, but I am not. I also know that with lack of activity it is normal to gain weight. Well, with my fabulous illioinguinal and genitofemoral nerves, walking around the block or even going on a bike ride are quite difficult and painful.

I long for the day when I can be active without 'paying for it.' I want so badly to move beyond this. To go on with my life. To finish God's will for me and my family, but it feels like the harder I try to move beyond the surgery, the more issues come up or refuse to dissipate.
January 2009 (5 weeks before Wes was born) / September 2011


  1. Mary Paul you are a beautiful mom and in my opinion that is not a job that lends itself to staying trim and slim. And you have had surgery on top of everything else. It is so hard to have the energy to exercise and eat right when you are sleep deprived and mentally drained. And I only have one. I guess one day I'll be back to a size I want, and you will too!

  2. you will get there....I know it must be frustrating though, but youve had a rough ride, my friend!! ((((hugs))))